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History IA Exemplar: Great Depression and Manchurian Crisis 1933 | RevisionDojo
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IB History HL Internal Assessment Exemplar: To what extent was the Great Depression's economic impact on Japan the leading cause of the Manchurian Crisis of 1933?
To what extent was the Great Depression's economic impact on Japan the leading cause of the Manchurian Crisis of 1933?
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6
Official IB Result
19/25
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19/25
0
13
25
4.1·Suggestion
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The title page image lacks a descriptive caption, which could clarify its relevance to the investigation’s focus.
4.2·Suggestion
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Footnote formatting is inconsistent (e.g., “<sup>1</sup>”), obscuring reference clarity; revise formatting to improve readability.
4.3·Weakness
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The Works Cited entries show varied citation formats, detracting from professional presentation.
4.4·Suggestion
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Standardize the bibliography using a consistent style (e.g., Chicago or MLA) to enhance clarity and scholarly rigor.
Criteria A: Identification and evaluation of sources
5/6
0
3
6
Criteria Strands
Excellent
Research question formulation
Excellent
Source selection and relevance
Excellent
Source analysis and evaluation
Criteria Feedback
Clear, focused research question with defined chronology and causation.
Identification of two appropriate secondary sources with explanations of relevance.
Detailed evaluation of origin, purpose and content, discussing value and limitations.
Lacks deeper historiographical nuance or sub-questions to sharpen focus.
Missing publication details (date, peer-review status) for Blumenthal’s working paper.
Limited interrogation of specific passages and reliance on some non-peer-reviewed material.
1.1·Strength
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The research question is prominently stated and clearly framed around causation with a defined chronology, demonstrating strong question formulation.
1.2·Strength
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The evaluation of Stewart’s journal article thoroughly addresses origin and purpose, demonstrating detailed source analysis.
1.3·Weakness
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The scope mentions multiple crises (Showa International, Warlord Era, Depression), which could diffuse focus; consider narrowing to sharpen analysis.
1.4·Strength
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The opening paragraph effectively restates the research question and scope, reinforcing the investigation’s focus.
1.5·Strength
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The identification of Stewart’s focus on economic incentives as a limitation is insightful and shows critical source evaluation.
1.6·Suggestion
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Consider incorporating a Japanese-origin source to balance the American perspective and mitigate bias in the Stewart article evaluation.
1.7·Weakness
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The use of a National WWII Museum webpage to support bias claims about the Stewart article is misplaced; select more directly relevant evidence.
1.8·Strength
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The evaluation of Blumenthal’s working paper effectively links data relevance to the research question and shows strong source selection.
1.9·Weakness
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The publication date of the Blumenthal source is not stated, reducing the contextual understanding of its data relevance.
1.10·Suggestion
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Include the working paper’s peer-review status and exact publication year to strengthen the evaluation of Blumenthal’s paper.
1.11·Weakness
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The use of a Medium.com article is questionable for academic rigor; evaluate its credibility and seek peer-reviewed alternatives.
Criteria B: Investigation
11/15
0
8
15
Criteria Strands
Good
Organization and clarity
Moderate
Critical analysis and evidence use
Poor
Perspective evaluation and conclusion
Criteria Feedback
Logical organization with clear sub-headings, integrated tables and footnotes for coherence.
Effective use of quantitative evidence (export indices, tariff data) to support arguments.
Nuanced analysis of multiple economic factors and sector-specific impacts.
Conclusion synthesizes key arguments and restates the thesis clearly.
Minor typographical errors and occasional duplication of source details create unevenness.
Some statistics are presented without fully integrating critical commentary.
Overuse of “Ibid.” reduces transparency; minor inconsistencies in figure/table labeling.
Counter-arguments and alternative perspectives receive limited depth of evaluation.
2.1·Suggestion
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Define explicit criteria or indicators for what constitutes a “leading cause” to provide sharper analytical direction.
2.2·Strength
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The use of export decline figures enriches the argument with quantitative evidence, demonstrating effective evidence integration.
2.3·Weakness
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The statement “Most historians agree” lacks citation support, making the claim unsubstantiated and weakening the opening argument.
2.4·Strength
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The discussion of yen depreciation, tariffs and unemployment demonstrates strong integration of multiple economic factors.
2.5·Weakness
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Frequent use of “Ibid.” obscures source transparency; fully cite each reference for clarity.
2.6·Suggestion
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Augment secondary data with primary government or archival reports to corroborate the statistical evidence presented.
2.7·Weakness
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The text refers to the data visualisation as “Figure 1” while the label reads “Table 4,” creating confusion in presentation.
2.8·Suggestion
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Analyze the unexpected recovery in Japan’s exports in 1932 to explore its implications for the argument’s trajectory.
2.9·Strength
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The export volume table vividly illustrates comparative data and enhances the investigation’s quantitative foundation.
2.10·Weakness
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Agricultural data rely on repeated “Ibid.” references without specifying original documents, reducing interpretative transparency.
2.11·Strength
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The sector-specific contrast between urban and agricultural impacts shows nuanced critical analysis of evidence.
2.12·Strength
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The discussion of Chinese political fragmentation offers valuable perspective evaluation and demonstrates awareness of alternative causes.
2.13·Suggestion
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Connect the conclusion explicitly to existing historiographical debates to demonstrate deeper critical engagement.
2.14·Strength
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The conclusion effectively restates the thesis and synthesizes key arguments, providing a clear resolution.
Criteria C: Reflection
3/4
0
2
4
Criteria Strands
Good
Methods reflection
Good
Historical challenges awareness
Good
Connection to investigation
Criteria Feedback
Insightful discussion of censorship and language barriers showing awareness of methodological challenges.
Explicit connection between reflection and the specifics of the Manchurian Crisis investigation.
Reflection on adapting methods (using secondary sources) to access primary economic data.
Reflection is relatively succinct and could be deepened with historiographical frameworks.
Does not examine how identified challenges might have altered the investigation’s conclusions.
3.1·Strength
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The reflection insightfully addresses censorship and language barriers, showing clear awareness of methodological challenges.
3.2·Suggestion
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Incorporate established historiographical methodological frameworks (e.g., source criticism models) to deepen the reflection’s theoretical grounding.
3.3·Weakness
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The reflection does not evaluate how methodological challenges might alter the investigation’s conclusions; consider adding this analysis.
3.4·Strength
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The reflection on using secondary sources to access primary economic data demonstrates strong awareness of methodological adaptation.