History Extended Essay Exemplar: To what extent did differences in… | RevisionDojo

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IB History SL Extended Essay Example

To what extent did differences in ethnic structure, political leadership and international involvement shape the contrasting developments of the conflicts in Slovenia and Bosnia and Herzegovina during the breakup of Yugoslavia (1991–1995)?SL

Official IB Result

IB Grade: A

Criteria A: Focus and Method

5/6

Criteria StrandsPro

A.1Topic communication and appropriateness

Excellent

A.2Research question clarity and focus

Good

A.3Methodology completeness and appropriateness

Moderate

Criteria Feedback

The student's topic is clearly historical, comparative, and well framed around a specific period and two case studies.
The student identifies a workable set of factors that gives the investigation a clear direction.
The student's research question is easy to follow and helps organize the essay into a coherent sequence.

The student's outcome needs a sharper definition so the comparison is more precise.
The methodology is more clearly stated than consistently demonstrated in the body of the essay.
The source-selection logic could be explained more explicitly, especially when combining different kinds of material.

Criteria B: Knowledge and Understanding

5/6

Criteria StrandsPro

B.1Application of source material

Good

B.2Subject knowledge and understanding

Good

B.3Use of terminology and concepts

Good

Criteria Feedback

The student uses source material that is mostly relevant to the research question and supports their main line of argument.
The student shows solid contextual knowledge of the dissolution of Yugoslavia and the two conflicts they are comparing.
The student's use of historical terminology is generally accurate and helps make the argument more academic.

Some evidence is used more as background than as closely analysed support for the claims being made.
At times, broad historical conditions are turned too quickly into direct causal explanations.
A few concepts would benefit from sharper definition and more precise linkage to the evidence.

Criteria C: Critical Thinking

11/12

Criteria StrandsPro

C.1Research quality

Moderate

C.2Analysis depth

Moderate

C.3Discussion and evaluation

Moderate

Criteria Feedback

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Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat.

Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur.
Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.

Criteria D: Presentation

3/4

Criteria StrandsPro

D.1Structure appropriateness

Excellent

D.2Layout and formatting

Good

Criteria Feedback

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat.

Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur.
Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.

Loading scores...

Official IB Result

IB Grade: A

Criteria A: Focus and Method

5/6

Criteria StrandsPro

A.1Topic communication and appropriateness

Excellent

A.2Research question clarity and focus

Good

A.3Methodology completeness and appropriateness

Moderate

Criteria Feedback

The student's topic is clearly historical, comparative, and well framed around a specific period and two case studies.
The student identifies a workable set of factors that gives the investigation a clear direction.
The student's research question is easy to follow and helps organize the essay into a coherent sequence.

The student's outcome needs a sharper definition so the comparison is more precise.
The methodology is more clearly stated than consistently demonstrated in the body of the essay.
The source-selection logic could be explained more explicitly, especially when combining different kinds of material.

Criteria B: Knowledge and Understanding

5/6

Criteria StrandsPro

B.1Application of source material

Good

B.2Subject knowledge and understanding

Good

B.3Use of terminology and concepts

Good

Criteria Feedback

The student uses source material that is mostly relevant to the research question and supports their main line of argument.
The student shows solid contextual knowledge of the dissolution of Yugoslavia and the two conflicts they are comparing.
The student's use of historical terminology is generally accurate and helps make the argument more academic.

Some evidence is used more as background than as closely analysed support for the claims being made.
At times, broad historical conditions are turned too quickly into direct causal explanations.
A few concepts would benefit from sharper definition and more precise linkage to the evidence.

Criteria C: Critical Thinking

11/12

Criteria StrandsPro

C.1Research quality

Moderate

C.2Analysis depth

Moderate

C.3Discussion and evaluation

Moderate

Criteria Feedback

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat.

Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur.
Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.

Criteria D: Presentation

3/4

Criteria StrandsPro

D.1Structure appropriateness

Excellent

D.2Layout and formatting

Good

Criteria Feedback

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat.

Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur.
Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.