English A Lang & Lit Extended Essay Exemplar: To what extent Kevin… | RevisionDojo
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IB English A Lang & Lit SL Extended Essay Example
To what extent Kevin Carter’s photojournalistic texts documenting human suffering raise
ethical issues of complicity and consent?SL
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B
Official IB Result
26/34
Criteria A: Focus and Method
5/6
0
3
6
Criteria StrandsPro
A.1Topic communication and clarity
Excellent
A.2Research question focus and appropriateness
Good
A.3Methodology completeness and effectiveness
Moderate
Criteria Feedback
The student communicates a clear and ethically focused topic throughout the essay.
The student's research question is purposeful and stays recognizably linked to the discussion.
The student uses a relevant comparative structure across the selected photographs and theoretical sources.
The student's focus sometimes becomes broader than the essay can fully manage.
Some claims are expressed too absolutely or imprecisely.
The student's method would be stronger if they explained more clearly why these images were selected and how sources were chosen.
1.1·Strength
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The research question is clear, ethically focused, and tightly anchored in Carter’s photojournalistic work. Framing the inquiry around both “complicity” and “consent” gives the essay a purposeful direction and makes the reader understand exactly what the investigation is testing.
1.2·Weakness
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The question is still broader than the essay can fully handle because “photojournalistic texts documenting human suffering” covers multiple conflicts, images, and ethical debates. A narrower corpus or a more specific evaluative phrase would make the method more manageable and improve focus throughout the essay.
1.3·Weakness
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This contextual claim is too general and is not yet tied tightly enough to the specific photograph under discussion. The student should connect historical context directly to the image’s ethical stakes and support major claims with clearer, image-specific evidence.
1.4·Suggestion
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The introduction establishes a strong conceptual frame, but the methodology would be clearer if the student briefly stated how the images were selected and how the theoretical sources would be used. That would make the investigation’s direction more explicit from the outset.
1.5·Question
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What evidence shows that the photographer’s “investment” necessarily means moral complicity, rather than professional observation under difficult reporting conditions? Considering alternative explanations here would make the method more rigorous.
1.6·Weakness
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This claim needs more careful sourcing and qualification because it is presented as certainty but reads like a broad causal assertion. The student should verify the evidence for political impact and distinguish between public visibility, pressure, and direct causal change.
Criteria B: Knowledge and Understanding
5/6
0
3
6
Criteria StrandsPro
B.1Knowledge of topic and sources
Moderate
B.2Use of terminology and concepts
Moderate
Criteria Feedback
The student demonstrates solid knowledge of Carter’s work and the major ethical debates surrounding photographic representation.
The student uses a wide range of relevant critical vocabulary and conceptual terms.
The student shows awareness of the relationship between image form, context, and ethical meaning.
Some contextual claims are too generalized or need stronger sourcing.
Several terms are used in ways that are conceptually interesting but not always fully justified by the image.
At times the student blurs the line between observable visual evidence and interpretive judgement.
2.1·Strength
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The student shows solid knowledge of Carter’s career and the two major historical contexts that frame the investigation. This gives the essay a credible foundation and helps the analysis move beyond purely abstract discussion.
2.2·Weakness
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This is interpretive knowledge rather than verifiable contextual detail, so it should be treated more cautiously. The student should separate what the photograph demonstrably shows from what the essay infers about audience response.
2.3·Weakness
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This statement overstates audience response as if it were uniform. The student should acknowledge that viewers may respond differently, and use evidence to show why a particular ethical reading is more persuasive than alternative reactions.
2.4·Strength
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This is a strong example of conceptual understanding because the student connects image structure to a broader ethical argument about photojournalism itself. The idea of the image commenting on its own production is sophisticated and clearly relevant to the topic.
2.5·Weakness
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The language is conceptually strong, but the claim needs sharper support and more careful distinction between description and judgement. The student should identify exactly which visual choices create this effect and avoid treating the ethical conclusion as self-evident.
2.6·Suggestion
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A brief explanation of why a low angle would position the viewer as a bystander would make the terminology more precise. The student already has the analytical vocabulary; the next step is to justify each concept more explicitly.
2.7·Weakness
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This phrase is too evaluative and incomplete for effective academic analysis. The student should replace broad descriptors like “animalistic” with more precise visual terminology and explain how the image formally produces the ethical response being argued.
Criteria C: Critical Thinking
9/12
0
6
12
Criteria StrandsPro
C.1Research quality and relevance
Moderate
C.2Analysis depth and effectiveness
Poor
C.3Discussion and evaluation
Poor
Criteria Feedback
The student builds a coherent argument that keeps returning to the ethical tension between witnessing suffering and risking complicity.
The student supports many points with close visual analysis rather than relying on summary alone.
The student does include some meaningful counterargument and moments of qualification, which gives the discussion more balance.
Some conclusions move too quickly from visual features to moral certainty.
The argument can become repetitive, especially when returning to voyeurism and dehumanization.
Counterarguments are present but not developed with enough depth, and some claims need more contextual support to be fully persuasive.
3.1·Strength
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The analysis is effective here because it moves from visual placement to ethical significance. This kind of close reading helps support the argument rather than simply describing the image’s content.
3.2·Weakness
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The conclusion is too large for the evidence given. The student should be careful not to infer a whole community’s social norms from one image without additional contextual support or a more limited claim.
3.3·Weakness
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This is a strong claim but it currently reads as if the image itself proves intent. The student should qualify the inference and show how the photograph supports, rather than conclusively establishes, this interpretation of the photographer’s role.
3.4·Weakness
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This evidence is used to support a major evaluative turn, but the argument does not yet show how the cited statement proves the broader ethical claim. The student should link the evidence more carefully to the conclusion about intervention and public responsibility.
3.5·Strength
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This is a useful moment of evaluation because it introduces an alternative reading instead of only repeating the accusation of voyeurism. That move strengthens the argument by showing some awareness of complexity and limits.
3.6·Weakness
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The word “inevitably” makes the claim too absolute. The student should either justify the inevitability with stronger evidence or soften the wording to reflect that the photograph may invite, rather than guarantee, this response.
3.7·Strength
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The student does well to introduce a counterargument here. Recognizing that the images may also function as reportage prevents the essay from becoming one-sided and strengthens the overall line of argument.
3.8·Weakness
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The argument is vivid, but it moves very quickly from metaphor to moral certainty. The student should slow down, distinguish the symbolic reading of the vulture from the photographer’s actual actions, and consider whether the image supports multiple ethical interpretations.
3.9·Question
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How far can an image prove the absence of consent, and where does the essay need contextual evidence to avoid turning vulnerability into automatic proof of non-consensuality? This question would sharpen the ethical reasoning.
3.10·Weakness
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This quotation is important, but the essay uses it as a near-final verdict rather than a prompt for deeper evaluation. The student should discuss its implications and limitations, especially for journalism, public awareness, and historical record.
Criteria D: Presentation
3/4
0
2
4
Criteria StrandsPro
D.1Structure appropriateness
Excellent
D.2Layout and formatting
Good
Criteria Feedback
The student's essay has a clear and appropriate overall structure with an introduction, developed sections, conclusion, and sources.
Headings and figure integration help the reader follow the argument.
The presentation is generally professional and easy to navigate.
Some paragraphing and source formatting are uneven.
A few bibliography and image-reference entries need greater consistency.
Some sections would read more smoothly with less crowded layout and more deliberate internal progression.
4.1·Strength
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The report follows a clear extended-essay structure, and the main sections are signposted in a logical order. This makes the argument easy to follow and shows good control of organization.
4.2·Strength
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The section title is purposeful and matches the essay’s argumentative movement. Clear headings like this help the reader see how the inquiry develops across different contexts.
4.3·Suggestion
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The section would be even stronger if the student reduced repeated phrasing and used shorter paragraphs with clearer topic sentences. That would help each image analysis build more cumulatively toward the conclusion.
4.4·Weakness
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This reference line appears to combine separate sources in a way that makes the bibliography hard to check. The student should ensure each entry is separated and formatted consistently so that sources are easy to verify and the work appears more polished.
4.5·Suggestion
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The essay already has the core structural elements required for a strong presentation. A final check for consistent citation style and cleaner source separation would make the document easier to navigate and more academically polished.
4.6·Weakness
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Several image-source entries are inconsistent in punctuation and web formatting. The student should standardize these references so the image citations are clearer and the bibliography looks more credible and professional.