Economics Extended Essay Exemplar: To what extent have increases in… | RevisionDojo
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IB Economics SL Extended Essay Example
To what extent have increases in excise taxation on cigarettes under Kenya’s Finance Acts (2021–2025) been effective in reducing cigarette consumption in Nairobi, Kenya?SL
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A
Official IB Result
29/34
Criteria A: Focus and Method
4/6
0
3
6
Criteria StrandsPro
A.1Topic communication and appropriateness
Good
A.2Research question clarity and focus
Good
A.3Methodology completeness and appropriateness
Moderate
Criteria Feedback
The student's research question is clearly phrased and stays visible throughout the report.
The student communicates the economic topic effectively and anchors it in a specific policy context, place, and time period.
The student includes a relevant range of methods and sources, including secondary data and a small primary survey.
The student's Nairobi focus is only partly maintained because much of the evidence they use is national rather than local.
The survey and secondary data are not fully integrated into a coherent method for answering the question.
Some method choices need stronger justification, especially how the sample and data sources can support the student's conclusion.
1.1·Strength
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The topic is communicated clearly and is tightly anchored in economics: government intervention, negative externalities, and excise taxation. The specific location and timeframe make the investigation appropriately bounded, which helps the reader understand exactly what will be examined.
1.2·Strength
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The research question is focused, explicit, and evaluative. By including the intervention, outcome, place, and time period, the student creates a question that can be followed consistently through the essay.
1.3·Suggestion
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The personal motivation adds authenticity, but the link to the investigation could be sharpened by ending with a more explicit methodological purpose. For example, the student could state how this experience shaped the choice of variables, sources, or research design.
1.4·Question
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What evidence will actually make the impact on Nairobi identifiable, rather than just inferable from national trends? The student should think about whether the available sources are local enough to support the geographic focus of the question.
1.5·Weakness
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This methodology needs a clearer justification of how the survey can answer the research question. A convenience sample of 50 users can provide perceptions, but it is too limited to measure a change in Nairobi consumption between 2021 and 2025 reliably. The student should explain how the survey and secondary data will be combined to address the question more convincingly.
1.6·Weakness
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This overstates what the evidence can prove. National sales trends do not directly demonstrate Nairobi smoking prevalence, and the survey is too small to justify a population-wide claim. The student should distinguish carefully between national market sales, local behaviour, and survey responses.
Criteria B: Knowledge and Understanding
4/6
0
3
6
Criteria StrandsPro
B.1Application and relevance of source material
Moderate
B.2Knowledge of topic/discipline
Moderate
B.3Use of terminology and concepts
Moderate
Criteria Feedback
The student selects a broad range of relevant economic and policy sources.
The student applies key concepts such as externalities, excise duty, inflation, elasticity, and affordability with reasonable clarity.
The student shows good awareness that price and policy effects must be interpreted through economic evidence rather than legislation alone.
Some of the student's most important evidence is not always directly relevant to Nairobi.
A few claims are supported only loosely, and some source details are incomplete or inconsistently referenced.
There are places where terminology and conceptual relationships are not fully secure or consistently explained.
2.1·Strength
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This is a strong selection of source types because it aligns the evidence with the economics concepts being investigated. Income, inflation, tax, revenue, and social-cost data are all relevant to evaluating whether excise taxation changes cigarette consumption.
2.2·Strength
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This shows good awareness of relevance: the student is not relying on tax rates alone but linking them to retail prices and consumption. That is an appropriate economic step because consumer behaviour responds to prices, not just to legislation.
2.3·Weakness
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This source application is weakened by unclear provenance and imprecise wording. The student should explain exactly how the brand list was derived and present the vendor-interview evidence more transparently, because without that clarity the representativeness of the price data is uncertain.
2.4·Weakness
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The table is useful, but the term 'estimated averages' is too vague for such central evidence. The student should state precisely how the averages were calculated and which brands or weights were used, otherwise the reader cannot judge the reliability of the figures.
2.5·Suggestion
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Consider writing the elasticity formula with mathematical notation and a brief explanation of the sign convention. That would make the concept more precise and help the reader see why cigarette demand is expected to be negative and inelastic.
2.6·Weakness
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This evidence is only partially relevant to Nairobi because it is national disposable income data. The student should either justify why national income is an adequate proxy for Nairobi households or find a city-level source, otherwise the link to the research question remains indirect.
2.7·Weakness
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This is not secure evidence of population prevalence. A sample of 50 respondents cannot establish Nairobi-wide smoking prevalence, so the student should rephrase this as survey findings rather than general population data.
2.8·Suggestion
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This is a good justification for trend analysis. The student could strengthen it further by briefly noting why year-to-year variation matters and how the chosen time series helps separate short-term noise from a policy trend.
Criteria C: Critical Thinking
12/12
0
6
12
Criteria StrandsPro
C.1Research quality and relevance
Poor
C.2Analysis depth
Poor
C.3Discussion and evaluation
Moderate
Criteria Feedback
The student builds a sustained argument that taxation appears to have had a partial effect on cigarette consumption.
The student uses several relevant quantitative comparisons, including price changes, inflation, income, sales, and revenue trends.
The student shows some evaluative awareness by considering alternative influences such as addiction, illicit markets, and other tobacco-control measures.
Some of the student's numerical treatment is unclear, especially the way inflation adjustment is handled.
Several conclusions rely on correlation rather than careful separation of causation from coincidence.
The discussion sometimes overstates what the evidence proves, particularly when moving from national trends to Nairobi-specific claims.
3.1·Strength
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This is a solid application of negative externality theory because it moves beyond definition into concrete social costs. The student is beginning to connect the theory to real consequences, which is essential for economic analysis.
3.2·Strength
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The student is making a relevant quantitative comparison and linking it to the policy change. This is good analysis because it begins to test whether the tax increase translated into higher retail prices.
3.3·Weakness
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The deflator method is not clearly or correctly expressed here. The student should define the base year and show the calculation step by step, because an unclear deflator weakens every later claim about real prices and affordability.
3.4·Weakness
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The causal explanation here is confused. An excise tax raises producers' costs and shifts supply toward MPC+tax, while the external cost remains between MPC and MSC unless the tax exactly matches the marginal external cost. The student should tighten the diagram explanation so the theory is economically consistent.
3.5·Suggestion
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The argument would be stronger if the student quantified this claim with an estimated PED range or a supporting source. A numerical elasticity estimate would allow the later burden-of-taxation discussion to be more than purely theoretical.
3.6·Weakness
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This is too assertive without evidence showing that consumer behaviour actually changed for the reasons proposed. The student should distinguish theoretical inference from observed behaviour and support the claim with data or survey results.
3.7·Question
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Does rising revenue by itself prove inelastic demand, or could other factors also explain it? The student should consider whether price, population growth, product substitution, or illicit trade might also influence the revenue trend.
3.8·Weakness
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This conclusion is too absolute. The burden cannot be said to fall 'entirely' on consumers without evidence on supply elasticity and market structure. The student should use more cautious wording and, if possible, support the claim with incidence analysis.
3.9·Suggestion
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This is a balanced conclusion. The student could strengthen the evaluation by explicitly separating what the data show from what the economic theory suggests and then stating which of those findings is most important for the research question.
Criteria D: Presentation
4/4
0
2
4
Criteria StrandsPro
D.1Structure appropriateness
Good
D.2Layout and formatting
Good
Criteria Feedback
The student's report follows a clear academic structure with introduction, methods, analysis, evaluation, conclusion, references, and appendices.
The student's presentation is generally readable and professionally organised, with page numbers, headings, tables, and labelled visuals.
The student includes the consent form and appendices appropriately, which shows responsible handling of primary research material.
Some cross-references and labels are inaccurate, which reduces precision.
The report would be easier to follow if different levels of evidence were signposted more clearly.
A few tables and figures would benefit from cleaner formatting and clearer notes on calculations and sources.
4.1·Strength
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The report follows a clear conventional structure, and the methodology section is clearly signposted. This helps the reader navigate the investigation and shows awareness of the expected organisation of an extended essay.
4.2·Strength
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The inclusion of appendices is appropriate and supports the main body of the essay by keeping survey material and consent information separate from the analysis. This is good academic organisation.
4.3·Suggestion
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Consider adding a brief note under the table explaining the calculation method and data source for each column. That would make the presentation of the quantitative analysis more transparent and easier to verify.
4.4·Weakness
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The essay would be structurally stronger if the discussion kept national sales evidence separate from survey prevalence evidence. At present, the argument shifts between different levels of analysis without clear signposting, which makes the line of reasoning harder to follow.
4.5·Weakness
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This internal reference is inaccurate and undermines structure. The student should correct all cross-references so that figures and tables are numbered consistently; otherwise the reader loses confidence in the organisation of the report.
4.6·Strength
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The consent form is well handled and shows appropriate academic organisation for primary research. Including the purpose, voluntariness, confidentiality, and withdrawal rights demonstrates responsible planning.